“… Well, for me, it’s like a thread that you give to the other person. You know, the connection. And by that, you start weaving memories that you choose for each person you gave your thread with, you will then notice that you create different patterns. Patterns that tailored just for each of them. And among them is a pattern that you unknowingly created. The one that is mostly abstract and out of concept. As time passed by, as it grows bigger and longer, you get familiar with it. So familiar that you created a kaleidoscope of patterns.
And then one day, you saw that he started weaving too. And with that, you put everything that you have so you both can reach each other. You invested physically and emotionally. You put passion into it. You’re so into it that you didn’t realize you’re taking the thread from your other connection.
And you stopped. All because you thought that you’ve done enough. And all you can picture right now is the finished product of what you did. Curious as a cat, you checked the other end, if he’s almost done too.
There comes the disappointment.
You thought it was special. You thought you were both into the same thing. But sadly, no.
And the weariness to everything suddenly poured into your being.
The next morning, you cut the thread. You looked at it one more time before burning it. You let the flames consume everything that you put yourself into and somehow you also wished that you can burn all the feelings that you have.”
Masturbating my Brain 